


Gossip

by thebasement_archivist



Category: The X-Files
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2001-01-15
Updated: 2001-01-15
Packaged: 2018-11-21 00:12:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11346012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thebasement_archivist/pseuds/thebasement_archivist
Summary: Skinner and Mulder should have watched the Monty Python episode "How not to be seen"





	Gossip

**Author's Note:**

> Note from alice ttlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Basement](http://fanlore.org/wiki/The_Basement), which moved to the AO3 to ensure the stories are always available and so that authors may have complete control of their own works. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in June 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [The Basement's collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/thebasement/profile).

 

Gossip by Blue Mohairbear

TITLE: GOSSIP  
AUTHOR: Blue Mohairbear  
BETA: frogdoggie and Sergeeva  
FANDOM: X-Files  
PAIRING: Skinner/Mulder  
RATING: PG  
FEEDBACK:   
WEBSITE: http://www.squidge.org/3wstop  
SERIES: ha ha  
ARCHIVING: yes, anywhere   
DISCLAIMER: Chris Carter is such a stubborn guy...  
SUMMARY: Skinner and Mulder should have watched the Monty Python episode "How not to be seen"  
WARNING: none  
NOTES: This is for my friend, Strafe. Hi, Strafe!!! She wrote me a lovely Haiku. You can find it on my website, under "Gifts from Friends".

* * *

*********************  
GOSSIP  
by Blue Mohairbear  
Deember, 2000  
*********************

"Sybil! Psssst - Sybil!"

"Helen? What is it, dear? Aren't you well, your face is all flushed..."

"No... I mean, I'm fine... listen, Sybil, you *have* to promise me you won't tell anyone about this - not a word!"

"I promise, Helen - so what happened?"

"Well... you know I've been using the stairs instead of the elevator for some weeks now, because of my heart and all and the doctor ---"

"Yes, yes, I *know* that, Helen. What *happened*?"

"So I was taking some files down to Finance - and guess whom I saw?"

"Helllllennnnn.....!"

"Okay, okay.... well, I saw Walter Skinner."

"Walter - ooh. The bald stud from the fourth floor?"

"Exactly. And guess what he was doing?"

"...???..."

"Ow. Don't pinch me. Sybil... Skinner - was - *smooching*."

"... no."

"Y-E-S."

"Wow."

"Exactly."

"Wow. So, who's the lucky girl? Do we know her? --- Helen...? Come on, stop grinning like the Cheshire Cat. Who is she?"

"Well, yes... I think you'll know whom I'm talking about... Skinner was kissing that cute agent from the basement. You know, the one who's always working those spooky cases?"

"Dana Scully? Walter Skinner kissed Dana Scully in the stairwell??? Helen, this is---"

"No, Sybil, I don't mean Dana. I mean her partner. The cute one with the haunted eyes and the bedhair - what's the name again?"

" - - - "

"Sybil? Close your mouth, dear... The name? It was some funny name..."

"F-f-fox Mulder... you mean *Fox Mulder*?!"

"Right. That's him. Fox Mulder."

"You're telling me that Walter Skinner kissed Fox Mulder in the stairwell?"

"Shhh - not so loud! But, yes, that's what I'm telling you."

"Helen, that's stupid. I mean, sorry, I didn't mean it like that, but... he *kissed* him? Are you sure? Are you sure they didn't just have a conversation and were standing a bit close?"

"Sybil - I *know* heavy smooching when I see it, it hasn't been *that* long since Harold and I - well, anyway. I don't think Mulder moaning and clutching Skinner's shoulders and Skinner rubbing himself against Mulder qualifies as "conversation" - oh my, is it hot in here?"

"You're flushed all over again, Helen."

"You too, Sybil."

"Hmmm, well... Did they notice you?"

"I don't think so. They were pretty preoccupied. *Very* preoccupied. Oh my. I think I'm off to the restroom. And remember, Sybil, not a word about this to anyone!"

"Promise, Helen."

\--- Five minutes later ---

"Barbara? Psssst - Barbara!"

"Sybil? What is it, dear? Aren't you well, your face is all flushed..."

"No, no, I'm fine... listen, Barbara, you *have* to promise me you won't tell anyone about this - not a word!"

**THE END**


End file.
